Set Me Free
by Irony
Summary: ~CHAPTER 2 UPLOADED!~ Rating change because of killing and more language. Gene+Suzuka, takes place five years after the Leyline, and the only characters are Gene, Suzu, and Jim. R&R, flames accepted.
1. Love At First Fight

Set Me Free  
  
Irony is back! And with a vengeance! My (read: stupid, accursed, irritating) computer shut down and refused to give me a backup file for the page-long story I had. Just another trivial matter piled atop all the other shit I have to deal with. Such as not being able to see or speak to my best friend until next year, being stuck in a motorhome for six or seven days straight with my little sister, my niece, my parents, and no computer, then going to some godforsaken little town in the middle of Nowhere, Arkansas, to see all my stupid relatives and not coming back until sometime next year. Uh-huh. Great. Okay, the story is a Gene+Suzuka romance. Suzuka's POV at first, after that, I'm not sure. Takes place about five years after the end of the series. Suzuka traveled with Gene and the crew for about a year before she left. Enjoy.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Outlaw Star or any of it's characters, and if I did, I'd have a better computer, and I'd be flying to Arkansas, not driving six days straight.  
  
Love At First Fight  
  
I sit down quietly in front of the coffeeshop, propping my bukuto next to me. Though I haven't managed to work as an assassin since I left the crew of the Outlaw Star, I still carry my bukuto with me. Even now, the reason I can't kill is amazing to me.  
  
All the time I traveled with Gene, he was very open, honest, and loving to all of us, and no matter how apathetic he might have acted outwardly, we all knew he cared. The time I spent with him softened my heart, to an extent that hasn't allowed me to kill since then. I used to block out sadness, happiness, and love, anything that might be a weakness, and kill without any emotion at all. On those few occasions when I needed that extra push to defeat my opponent, I would fuel myself on hatred and rage.  
  
Now, I'm forced to check the smile on my face when I watch a child playing on the sidewalk. I have to fight back tears when I see the homeless families on the streets. I no longer automatically block my feelings. I keep having to hold back the outward signs.  
  
It's bizarre, but I just can't go back to the way things were. Every time I try to kill, I see Gene's face as he inhaled the scent of my sash, the way he looked at me when he relented, permitting me to come along with them. Images race through my mind, Gene holding Melfina's hand, the guilt-ridden tones in his voice as he told me his fears about not being able to keep his promise to Melfina. The single tear that slipped down his battle-scarred face when I asked him about the outlaw, Hilda. He was so compassionate, yet so able. It was obvious to me that he'd come a long way in the world, but equally clear that he had a long way to go. And he could make it. He had the ability. The immorality, the ruthlessness, the physical capability. But somehow, and it still escapes me as to how, he retained a naive innocence, a kawaii foolishness. And he was able to keep his emotions. He could love, he could be happy, he could be sad. It was all displayed. He loved all of us, but Melfina most of all. He was almost always happy, nothing could change that. And I've seen him cry. About Hilda, once . . . and again when I left.  
  
I'm surprised to feel a lump in my throat. Memories are too much to bear. I swallow hard, setting my mocha down and staring at the sidewalk.  
  
"Is that who I think it is? My favorite beautiful class-A assassin?"  
  
The all-too-familiar voice makes my heart skip about thirteen beats. I don't dare turn and see who it is. My heart seems to already know. "So we meet again," I whisper to myself.  
  
"Been awhile, na, Suzu-chan?"  
  
Slowly, I stand up and turn to look. It is. The tall, muscular frame, broad shoulders, narrow waist, the crooked grin, the unruly red hair, the dark, laughing eyes, the beauty of his face only enhanced by the scars that cross it. It's Gene. It would be useless to try to hold back my emotions now.  
  
"Gene!" I leap at him, embracing his neck, nuzzling the side of his face and breathing in his cologne.  
  
"Whoa!" His arms automatically catch my waist and hold me up, my feet off the ground. Carefully, he sets me down. Then he notices something amusing. "Ooh, lookee! Either you shrunk, or I grew!"  
  
Amusing to him, anyway. I glare up at him. "Quit growing, damnit!"  
  
Gene chuckles, a carefree sound that makes me smile. "Sorry. What are you doing down on Centennial?"  
  
"Drinking a mocha."  
  
"Anou . . .are you developing a sense of humor?" Gene wonders aloud.  
  
"Iie," I state flatly. I gesture to his car. "Iku."  
  
He smiles at me. "Sure."  
  
   
  
Ten minutes later, we're driving, and I've got my head out the window in an idiotic gesture of cheer.  
  
"Suzuka, get . . . the car . . . you're gonna . . ."  
  
I can hear only bits of what Gene is saying. The rest is lost in the wind. "WHAT?!"  
  
"The frickin' . . . you'll . . . over . . ."  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"GET IN THE CAR!"  
  
I jerk my head in. "Jeez, you didn't have to yell."  
  
"Yeah, I did."  
  
I laugh and tug my hair loose, shaking my head. As I attempt to fix my hair, a thought occurs to me. "Gene, what about the others?"  
  
"The others?" Gene repeats blankly.  
  
"The rest of the crew," I remind him, looking puzzled. "Remember?"  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Oh?" I echo. "That's it?"  
  
Gene shakes his head, never taking his eyes off the road. "No. Aisha left about a week after you did. She returned to the Ctarl-Ctarl Empire. Jim's still with me, and Melfina . . ."  
  
"Melfina?" I prod, my heart sinking.  
  
"Melfina's gone."  
  
I stare at him a long time before looking away, focusing on the endless white line on the pavement outside. Melfina? Gone? Oh, Kami . . . the poor girl . . . I wonder how that happened . . . and Gene, no doubt, feels it's his fault.  
  
Jim's still with Gene, though. Wow. Been five years since the end of our journey to the Leyline. Been four years since I last saw any of the crew. Gene . . . is taller, damnit, but otherwise not changed. He grew his hair out again. That's good. I didn't like the other haircut . . . oh, my Kami, Gene is twenty-five now! I knew that, of course, but it hadn't really occurred to me.  
  
Hmm . . . if Gene's twenty-five, then Jim is sixteen. Waa . . . Let's not think about that. I can't imagine a sixteen-year-old Jim.  
  
I wonder if they're still at Starwind and Hawking. A glance out the window informs me that they've relocated. What . . . oh. We're there. Duh, Suzuka.  
  
I get out of the car, looking around me curiously. "Nice place," I comment dryly. Gene shrugs and steps past me, into the building.  
  
"Hell, it's not exactly on the good side of town . . ."  
  
My eyebrows shoot up at the sound of the smooth alto voice. A tall, slim young man steps out. "Suzuka! Where have you been these last four years?"  
  
"J-Jim?" I can't help but stutter. There is no way that is little Jim Hawking.  
  
He grins at me. "Yeah."  
  
"U-uso . . ." It has to be him. Those sapphire blue eyes, that rough blonde hair . . . I almost laugh aloud.  
  
"Yeah, it's me. Ya miss me?" Jim laughs.  
  
"Anou . . . chotto," I manage before hugging him tightly.  
  
"Hey, you two! You comin' in or not?" Gene calls from inside.  
  
Jim links his arm in mine and we walk inside together.  
  
Later, I sit in front of the TV, not really watching it. Gene looks at me oddly. "Are you planning on turning the TV on?"  
  
"No." I'm thinking about the time Gene and I first met, and the TV will only distract me.  
  
"Penny for your thoughts."  
  
I'm tempted to tell him it'll cost him a deal more than that, but I suppress my sense of humor for now. "Remember when we first met?"  
  
"Like I could forget," Gene returns wryly.  
  
"I was going to kill Fred . . ."  
  
"But you never killed me. And you remember the deal, I'm sure."  
  
"Uh-huh. And I can't kill you."  
  
"Why not? If it was necessary . . ."  
  
"No. I couldn't do it."  
  
"Elaborate?"  
  
"Ever since you let me join you and the crew of the OLS, you've been nothing but openhearted to all of us, and I didn't deserve it. It surprises me that you can keep your emotions intact and nevertheless kill like it's nothing. I've always had to block my emotions, and I can't do it anymore. Not since I left. And even if I could block my feelings still, I wouldn't be able to kill you. You've been too good to me . . ."  
  
Gene bows his head for a moment, then meets my gaze, looking solemn. "You deserved it, Suzu. You know you did. Don't degrade yourself. You're really a good person, and you deserved everything that came to you."  
  
"Bad with the good, right?" I ask, smiling slightly.  
  
"Yeah," Gene answers. "Bad with the good. As for keeping my emotions, I'm not sure how I do it, either. But when I kill, it's not . . . nothing. The difference between you and I is that you would kill emotionlessly, while I'm fueled by my emotions." He shakes his head. "We're very different, and yet so alike in some ways."  
  
I raise an eyebrow. "Some ways? Like what?"  
  
"Like . . ." Gene starts.  
  
I fight the smirk that wants to appear on my face. "Like?"  
  
"Okay, maybe we're not too alike," Gene admits, grinning.  
  
I nod. "Do you believe in love at first sight?" Where did that come from?  
  
"Nah . . . it's a ridiculous concept, really. I just don't think it's possible. Do you?"  
  
"No. I believe more in love at first fight."  
  
"How so?" Gene questions, tilting his head.  
  
"Well, if you meet someone, and the first thing you do is get in a fight, there's really nowhere to go but up in that relationship. That makes more sense, I think. If the first words you speak to the other person are, 'I love you,' then you've got a long way to fall. But if you first exchange harsh words, then you can only go up." I point at the ceiling to emphasize my point.  
  
Gene nods slowly, looking at me.  
  
What is he thinking?  
  
"Harsh words, na? Like, 'Okay, whaddaya say we play fair?'"  
  
An uneasy feeling begins to grow in the pit of my stomach. Is he going to say what I think he's going to say?  
  
In a soft mockery of my own voice, he responds to himself, 'Charming. Do you actually think your using a sword would be challenging?'"  
  
Love at first fight. I look away from him. He's insane.  
  
I don't love him. 


	2. Falling For You

Set Me Free

Disc: Don't own OLS or any characters therein. 

Authoress' Rant: Second chapter! I wonder if I'll be able to finish it. We'll see. Anyway, I've taken Suzu's affection down a peg or two, based on _her _decision to return once again to her life as a cold-hearted, uncaring assassin. Thanks for the reviews, minna-san, and I hope you'll like this chapter just as well (if not better!).

Falling For You

The TV seems to get louder and louder as each second passes. I really don't like it all that much, but I don't want to interrupt Jim by telling him I'm leaving. 

Quietly, I creep out of the room, hoping that Jim won't notice, and I can sneak out of the house for some peace and quiet. Well, Jim doesn't notice, but Gene does. In fact, I run into him, drop my bukuto, trip over it, and fall right into the arms of the redheaded outlaw.

"I guess this means you're falling for me, huh?" Gene asks.

"What?" I push him away, the word coming out more harshly than I intended. Brushing myself off, I pick up my bukuto and walk past him without meeting his amused gaze.

The next day, I wander aimlessly around the room, deep in thought. That comment Gene made yesterday is still bothering me. Why does it bother me this much? If I don't love him, then why . . . no. I'm _not _falling for him, so it shouldn't be bothering me, right? 

AUGH! This is so irritating! Why, why, why, why, WHY, Kami-sama, WHY doesn't this make sense?! 

_"I guess this means you're falling for me, huh?"_

His voice echoes in my head, and I let out a furious scream. 

"Hey, what's wrong, Suzuka?"

I spin around to see Jim standing in the doorway, looking puzzled. That's when I make up my mind. Love him or not, Gene is an outlaw, and I am an assassin, and that's how it will stay. I am an assassin. No more happy-Suzu. No more hugging, smiling, crying, laughing, and God forbid I ever love again. "Nothing. Why would anything be wrong?" My voice gives away no emotion whatsoever, and I silently congratulate myself.

Jim takes a step back, probably shocked by my voice. "Well, you just . . . screamed."

"So? I can scream if I want. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to be alone."

Jim takes another slow step back, then turns and runs. I startle myself by giving a harsh laugh. On a whim, I snatch up my bukuto. Money is to be earned today. I will definitely kill. 

Some time later, the man shuffles nervously through a stack of papers, while I sit in a nearby chair, bukuto in hand, looking incredibly bored. 

"Um . . . I'm not, uh, sure if we should do this . . . is this, like, breaking the law? I mean, I want him out of my way, but . . . kill him? Will I get charged with murder?"

I mutter a vague insult. "Just make up your mind, Mr. Kasumi."

"Um . . . okay, yeah. I'll give you, ah . . ."

_"Harsh words, na?" _

Something inside me snaps as my mind replays Gene's comment for about the millionth time. My head jerks up. "A simple job like this is merely a warm-up. Twenty thousand wong."

"Okay . . ." the man agrees reluctantly.

Shortly following, a sigh escapes my lips as I look at the receptionist from underneath a cloak. "Jennifer Mills."

"Alright, he'll see you in a few moments. Have a seat."

This was going to be just like my job with Fred, only without the redheaded sharpshooter in my way. I lean against the wall, staring at the floor. My hold tightens on the wooden sword in my right hand. 

__

"Remember when we first met?"

"Like I could forget."

This little clip of a conversation plays over and over in my head. 

"Shut up!" I yell at the carpet. People immediately begin to watch me more closely. Dammit. Not good. 

__

" . . . it's not . . . nothing." Gene's voice again. _" . . . when I kill, it's not . . . nothing."_

"Miss Mills? Mr. Ikato will see you now."

I look at the receptionist. "Thank you." I need to get this over with. The longer I put it off, the harder it'll be, especially with Gene's words haunting me.

I walk into the office.

"Okay, Miss . . . Mills. You wanted to see me about -"

"Don't waste my time, Ikato. I've come to kill you." I let the cloak drop to the floor. 

"Twilight Suzuka?" the man gasps.

"Precisely. You have five minutes to say your goodbyes. I'd advise you spend it wisely." I keep my tone neutral. I won't fail this time.

"B-b-but . . ." Ikato falters.

__

"But you never killed me. And you remember the deal . . ."

"Shut up . . ." I manage through gritted teeth.

"I . . ." Ikato tries again.

"You have two minutes remaining." I have gained enough control to inform him of his approaching doom.

Ikato hangs his head in defeat. 

__

" . . . Whaddaya say we play fair?"

" . . .My favorite beautiful class-A assassin?"

"This smells real nice. That's a beautiful woman for you."

"SHUT UP!" I scream.

Ikato looks at me. My response is, "You have less than a minute, Ikato. The sun will soon sink below the horizon."

I gaze out the window for a moment, then jump into the air and bring my bukuto down on the pleading businessman as calmly as possible, considering Gene's voice is echoing in my head, choking and breaking as he speaks quietly about Hilda's death. 

In one swift movement, Ikato's life leaves his body, and just as quickly, I leave the room, slipping easily past the guards who rush in at Ikato's death-cry.

That evening, in my bedroom, I stare at the blood on my bukuto and think aloud, "And Twilight Suzuka strikes again."

"Who was it?"

I don't bother turning to see who it is. Gene. "Some businessman named Ikato."

"I thought you couldn't kill?" This seems more of a question than a statement.

"I lied," I answer dismissively. Perching on the edge of the bed, I begin removing the crimson stains from the wooden blade.

Gene takes a step into the room to look at me closely. "Are you okay?"

"Do you care?" I articulate calmly. Since I came home, I've calmed down a lot. Gene sits down on the bed next to me. "What happened to the other Suzu? The one who smiled and laughed, and had fun? Where'd she go?"

I look at Gene for a long moment before answering. "She's gone. The old Suzuka is back now, and that's how it will stay."

"Why?" Gene questions.

So there's no chance that I might fall in love with you. "I can't make a living crying at Hallmark commercials, Gene."

Gene searches my eyes for the answer that he wants to hear. He won't find it there. Without another word, I stand up and leave.

Days later, I step inside, shaking the rain out of my hair and off my clothes. Jim greets me quietly, probably the first words he's spoken to me since I snapped at him the other day. I simply walk past him, into my bedroom, to clean the blade of the wooden sword for the third time in three days. 

"One point three million wong in three days," I say to myself. "Better than I did before I ever came here." Before I ever met Gene. I'm priding myself on this when a knock sounds on the door. "Nani?"

"Suzu?"

Annoyed, I walk to the door and open it, glaring at Gene. "I would greatly appreciate it if you would not call me Suzu."

"Whatever. Look, Jim and I were thinking of taking off somewhere. You comin'?"

I glare at him for a long time. "I'd prefer to stay here. And if I did go somewhere tonight, it would assuredly not be with you." The door quickly closes, and I kick back on my bed, listening as the front door opens and shuts. Before I open the window, I listen carefully to make sure that they're gone.

The cool air washes over me, and I sigh in relief, turning on the radio. Alanis. Head Over Feet. What a bad song to hear right now. 

__

You are the bearer of unconditional things,

You held your breath . . . and the door for me.

Thanks for your patience.

I turn it off. The phone rings downstairs, and I completely ignore it. Until I hear the voicemail message.

"Suzuka. Hmmm. I know you're there right now, so why don't you save my brother and I a lot of trouble, and just pick up?"

"Ron MacDougall?!" I simply fly downstairs and snap up the vidphone, glaring at the familiar face on the screen. "What the hell do you want?"

"Simple. You see, Suzu, my brother and I need your help."

I sneer at him. "Do I look like a psychiatrist? And don't call me Suzu."

"I'm serious. We want Starwind dead. Now." Ron looks somber.

"And if I refuse?" My mind is racing for an excuse.

"You'll miss out on ten million. Plus, your secret will be out."

"Ten million?" This is appealing. But . . . "What secret?"

Ron smiles manipulatively. "I think you know. Or must I tell you?"

"Yes, MacDougall, please tell me this secret that you plan on using to manipulate me into doing your dirty work."

"Well, the ruthless assassin Twilight Suzuka . . . is not so ruthless, when it comes to a certain pesky redheaded outlaw."

My heart is pounding. "I don't know what the hell you're talking about."

"I think you do."

I allow an agitated silence to pass, then ask, "Why do you want him dead?"

"He's taking too much bounty." Ron scowls. "Doesn't leave Harry and I enough room."

"I'll get back to you, MacDougall."

"No, you'll tell me now, or we'll hire someone who _isn't _in love with Starwind."

"Fine," I snap in angry surrender. "It'll be done by sundown tomorrow."

"Good. See that it is. Any later, and the ten million stays in our hands." Ron disappears.

Slowly, I hang up the phone and walk upstairs, going and staring out the window. What have I gotten myself into? I can't kill Gene. I said it myself . . .

__

"Remember when we first met?"

"Like I could forget."

"I was going to kill Fred . . ."

"But you never killed me. And you remember the deal, I'm sure."

"Uh-huh. And I can't kill you."

"Why not? If it was necessary . . ."

"No. I couldn't do it."

"I couldn't do it," I whisper aloud. This is going to be sheer hell. What was I thinking, making a deal with a MacDougall? They probably had found out (somehow) about my . . . devotion . . . to Gene, and decided to have some fun by getting me to kill him. How do you get yourself out of this one, Suzuka?


End file.
